Circles of Support

Mark Ryan and I took a road trip two weeks ago. His wife was expecting a baby and I wanted to check out the Scorpion hydrogen sports car being built near me. We both wanted a little time out of the house.

On the hour long drive we talked about many things. One of them was how people stay stuck without new support.

If someone has a circle of friends that keeps them feeling that they can’t have much more in their lives, they won’t attempt to have any more.

Their immediate support group will “support” them in staying right where they are.

For example, when I was in college, most of my friends felt the only way to increase their income was to get a better job. Everyone I talked to felt the same way.

That’s because my circle was thinking the same way. We all believed the same thing. We supported each other in being stuck.

In my forthcoming audio program, The Awakening Course, I explain that most people are in the first stage of life: victimhood.

They feel stuck, they attract people that feel the same way, and so the state of being a victim continues. It’s simply reinforced.

For example, I saw an old friend in Ohio. He told me he could never have the life I have. When I asked why, he basically said it wasn’t possible for him.

Now, I could talk to him for hours about new realities and new possibilities if he just read The Attractor Factor or watched the movie The Secret and learned more about the Law of Attraction.

But when I left, he would turn to his current family and friends, or to his coworkers, ask them what they think, and they would reinforce his original belief that it wasn’t possible for him.

He would then shrug his shoulders and say, “See? It isn’t possible for me.”

You can change, of course.

In The Awakening Course I say the right story can awaken you to the next stage, and I tell several to help you awaken from the trance of limitation.

But a faster and more permanent way to change is to attract people who support your dreams.

Today my circle of friends generally believes nothing is impossible.

We don’t know what our limits are, don’t pay too much attention to current reality, and try for whatever we want. My circle supports that thought process, so it’s easier to move forward with even the biggest dreams and goals.

For example, right now I’m planning a movement to end homeslessness. No one in my circle thinks I’m nuts. Instead, they encourage me.

However, if I talk to the homeless, they feel they are stuck. When they talk to their circle, they agree they are stuck.

But when I talk to them, I introduce a new reality, one that supports their advancement. If they listen to me, and if they or I create a new circle of support for them, they can and will change.

And here’s how magic happens once you make a decision and take action..

At the airport on the way to Chicago, I stumbled across a book called Until It’s Gone, which is about ending poverty in this country. The basic idea is to create new circles of support. This book and the author’s model for change will help me end homelessness.

Again, if you are stuck, most likely you have a circle of friends and family that help you stay there. They aren’t doing it on purpose. They aren’t trying to hold you down. And you are participating by allowing it to happen.

This has to change for you to change.

There’s no one to blame here. You don’t need to fire your family or friends. (Then again, maybe you do.) But you do need to take responsibility for where you are and make new decisions to change what you don’t like.

You need an encouraging support team. So do those in poverty. So do the homeless. So does anyone trying to overcome any challenge.

Mark and I talked about this and realized a good reason to attend events is to have support. You are placed in an environment of encouragement. You meet new people. You create mastermind groups and new circles of friends. These can last a lifetime.

I’m hosting the Miracles Weekend at the end of September for this reason. If you haven’t signed up for it yet, you can at www.miraclesweekend.com/register

Everyone who attends the event will receive The Awakening Course, including two bonuses: The Awakened Millionaire and Awakened Relationships. They will also receive the new expanded edition of The Attractor Factor. And each person will receive a ticket to Pat O’Bryan’s Unseminar 6. Again, register at www.miraclesweekend.com/register (I’ll keep the price at $997 for you, since you found the offer on my blog.)

Our road trip went well.

I ordered a Scorpion and Mark’s baby was born.

It’s a girl named Claire.

I imagine she’ll do wonders in the world, due to all the support she will receive from her circle of family and friends — all of which believe in and even expect miracles.

Ao Akua,

Joe
www.mrfire.com

PS – The book Until It’s Gone is by Scott Miller. He believes poverty can be ended in the USA. His description of “circles” is worth study. See www.movethemountain.org 

Note: Having a coach is a proven way to get results fast. A coach is part of your circle of support. If you don’t have one, consider getting a Miracles Coach. Check out www.miraclescoaching.com 

25 Comments

  1. August 19, 2008 at 8:10 am

    I’ve certainly had that experience. I used to set my sights low, but now… there are no limits. I’ve been successful in every area but one, and I’ve finally decided it’s time to change that reality — and deal with it. My husband believes in me and I’m gathering other people who want to change their reality and deal with whatever their “one last thing” is.

    Life is good. 😉

  2. Mark Ryan-Reply
    August 19, 2008 at 8:36 am

    Hello Uncle Joe!

    Baby Claire says thanks for mentioning her in your post:-)

    It was a great outing with you that day. I still find it fascinating that we were talking about how amazing water is and how it can power a car…and then Kathy calls to tell me her water broke. Water giving birth to a new car for you and a new Baby for me!

    The other thing people may not know is how this seminar has taken on legs of its own…how it has changed from its inception.
    People really seem to want specific Miracles from this seminar…Wealth…Health…and Relationships.
    And it is incredible how you are changing the format of the Miracles weekend to make sure they get what they ask for.

    This is one of the great things about you Joe…you practice what you preach!
    You are not limited by what you initially decided…if change is in order…YOU CHANGE IT!

    This will be a GREAT seminar!

    I cannot wait to meet all the wonderful folks who are coming

    Mark

  3. August 19, 2008 at 10:33 am

    Joe,

    What you said about having the right circle of support rings very true for me. I’m a very serious student of Parelli Natural Horsemanship (PNH), best described as personal development for the human via developing communication and a relationship with your horse. PNH not only offers DVD-based home study materials, but also has certified/licensed instructors that give inspiring clinics; yearly Savvy Conferences in Colorado; they tour every year, putting on demonstrations that wow and envigorate PNH followers; and there is a Savvy Club that offers benefits to members and an online Forum—basically, it’s the Savvy circle of support.

    At the last clinic I attended, the instructor was teaching us how to handle it when we received an unexpected response from our horses in answer to the question we’d asked. There are two ways to think about it: “Oh no” and “Oh Boy!” To a practitioner of the LOA, it’s pretty obvious what he was talking about. But he also said that whatever reaction you have is likely to be the one that is supported by your circle of friends! He cautioned that as we progress along the PNH pathway, we might lose some of them because they won’t be able to support our new mindset.

    How uncanny that it mirrors what you’re saying right now.

    JB

  4. Jeff O.-Reply
    August 20, 2008 at 2:53 am

    Joe,

    I find it funny how I stumbled onto this blog post. Three weeks ago I decided to stop hanging around my main circle of friends for many of the same reasons you named in your post. And recently I have thought of going back, but reading this post reminded me why I left. Now it is time to setup an intention to attract the new supportive friends into my life.

    Jeff

  5. Kathy Blanton-Reply
    August 20, 2008 at 10:16 am

    Joe, I took the miracles group coaching last fall and am now taking individual miracles coaching and your executive business coaching. And just in the last few days I have had a burning desire to find or start a mastermind miracles group here in Atlanta. Are there folks here in Atlanta who are currently involved or have completed these offerings that I could collaborate with to get this going in Atlanta?

  6. August 20, 2008 at 10:19 am

    Joe,
    I haven’t been to your blog in a while, but this post was just what I needed. I chanaged my circle 2 years ago (for the better) but recently allowed myself to be defined by my new circle in ways I don’t like.
    No need to fire my circle now, but I definitely want to conciously choose who I spend time with and how I allow them to affect me.

    thanks for such a timely post. Figuring out a way to make it to your event!

  7. Jeff S.-Reply
    August 20, 2008 at 10:45 am

    Joe,

    Do you have a fireplace? Some cool Texas evening pull one ember out and separate it from the rest of the fire. It will soon die and go out. We must surround ourselves with like-fire or the same thing will happen to us.

    BTW-be sure and post a pic of the new car. My personal intention is the new Toyota Hybrid-X with suicide doors!

    JS

  8. August 20, 2008 at 10:52 am

    If your intent to end homelessness could benefit from a liason in Los Angeles, I’d be happy to devote a couple of hours a week. Just let me know, Joe!

    Ever your bud,
    Tennyson

  9. August 20, 2008 at 10:56 am

    Hi Joe,

    I’m pleased to have find this post. Since I started to run my course Recreating Your Life in Brazil, 17 years ago, about the law of attraction, I’ve been encouraging the participants to study together during the 6 weeks course – 1 class per week – and create a space for intimacy and friendship, as they had something in common and probably would find more. Even marriages and long terms friendships were the results of those meetings. Another concept I introduced in that time was to know who in the group had the most challenging situation and then the whole group would join to help him/her. One of the most dramatic out come happened with a woman called Ruth who had breast cancer and her life was totally messed up. After just only ONE session with her laying on the middle and more than 20 people sending energy through their hands, those were the results: she stopped with chimio and radio therapy, finally got courage to broke with her abusive husband, got a new job and kept the children in a new happy home.
    Just ONE session Joe. The power of “TOGETHER WE CAN” is astonishing!
    A big admiration and gratitude for what you doing.
    PS-Hypnotic Marketing 2.0 is amazing and resulting – thanks again.
    :lol::lol:

  10. August 20, 2008 at 11:40 am

    Hi Joe. I just wanted to comment on your crusade to end homelessness. Using this concept of the circle will certainly help. Since first watching The Secret in February 2008 I thought that learning and practicing the LOA would finally enable me to help the homeless is a very special way. Unfortunately, there have been no changes for me as yet that would FINANCIALLY allow me to implement my idea. I had thought of emailing you to tell you my idea back in February but to be honest, I thought you might just be “like all the others” I’ve come across over the years. I know now that you are sincere because I’ve been following you quite a bit (although, not on Twitter!) and when this email arrived to me this morning about the circle I thought I would come over and read about it. When you stated within that blog post about your intention of putting an end to homelessness once and for all, well that seemed like the LOA in action, now didn’t it? So, I give to you Mr. Vitale, my idea – I’m sure it is already part of your idea but if you can use even one little thing from it and it ends up helping – then my dream has finally manifested! First, each person who would enter my “Homeless Spa” would do their very best to commit to 13 weeks of staying, watching The Secret on TV’s throughout the building (which would all be hung from the ceiling and play non-stop), showering daily, getting haircuts, wearing their new clothes provided to them, dependent upon their passion of “what they always wanted to be”. These would be specially ordered and custom fit (seamstress and staff in house). This, in my thinking, puts each person on the beginning of their path to becoming what they want. If they no longer see the old clothes from the old life in their mirror and they start to dress the part of the new – well, they’re already part way there, aren’t they? All cleaned up, smelling wonderfully, colognes, perfumes, whatever makes them truly believe they are beginning to live the different life. Combine that with the teachings of The Secret and The Seven Laws of The Universe, we are well on our way. (This is a LOT of time and money involved Joe and it is not something I have so be prepared that if you choose my idea – well, you better get to writing a lot more books!). See, in house we need….barbers/hairstylists, manicurists, makeup instructors, tutors (to now teach the newly acquired skills one would need to get started in their new choice of business/career), psychologists/coaches for the re-building of self-esteem and self-confidence, chefs, housekeepers, a couple of computer geeks for those middle of the night computer crashes, doctor/nurse to administer whatever meds people SHOULD have been on for better health (ie high blood pressure, heart trouble, etc.). This is, of course, just the beginning and all have to volunteer. This is an opportunity for everyone to make something more of themselves and contribute to the ending of homelessness. My theory is simple…..Hand over the tools one would need to further themselves in their lives, ACTUALLY TEACH AND SHOW THEM how to use those tools properly – no just handing over 1000 pages of reading here – allow one and all to begin to put their new skills into practice. So, if we have a lady or chap who wants to be a Carpenter – well then, there are things in the Spa that will need repair, rebuilding, adding on to – that is their job to accomplish. Hairstylist/Barber? Well, put on the jacket, grab the scissors and start grooming those who want/need the grooming. (All of this after some training and practice please – don’t want to chop off any ears!). You get my drift, right? We can’t just keep clothing homeless people and giving them food and tucking them away. They are the same as us. We are all the same. Give us the training – some more than others – SHOW us and let us mimmick what we see. Finally, at the end of the minimum time, we then assist in finding the first job for each Spa member to start at so they may begin their new venture in their lives. Companies can & will get on board for this. If they, as a Company, want to be recognized and well – respected in the world, they WILL hop on board and positions will be opened up and OUR newly trained, open-minded Spa attendees will be placed and promoted! This is just the beginning of my idea. I tend to get a little stymied because of lack of funds but YOU can put this (or at least some of it) into motion and I cannot wait to see what you accomplish! When my situation changes, I will pop back over here and let you know that I will then be contributing my funds also. All the best to you in your challenge and if anyone can get this done – it’s you. You’ve been there – you know EXACTLY what needs to be done. All the best….

  11. August 20, 2008 at 12:37 pm

    Joe,

    As usual I was just thinking the same thing.

    I wanted to make some changes in my member site, but all my friends didn’t get it.

    Ah, who shows up but an old friend, John Gallagher from http://www.LearningHerbs.com. He gets it and supports me.

    I will listen to my other friends less and John more.

    Cool.

    William

  12. Tiffany-Reply
    August 20, 2008 at 1:06 pm

    BEAUTIFUL! Thank you for this Joe (as always, such great information – I soak up all I can from things you write and publish)!

    Most people I know don’t think or believe this way but I continue on with this way of thinking, and hopefully will manifest more like-minded people soon.

  13. Bill Balena-Reply
    August 20, 2008 at 3:55 pm

    Since you in the last few posts you mention a friend in Ohio and you recent trip there I wanted to relate this story. Last year my wife was working on a special project at her company’s home office in Pittsburgh. At the time i was reading Hypnotic Marketing. She saw your name and mentioned that in the course of her work she was collaborating with a professor at the University of Pittsburgh named Dr. Vitale. She said he was from Youngstown, and that his brother is an author. Are you that author?

    BTW, the project she was doing earned an international marketing award.

  14. August 20, 2008 at 4:00 pm

    Bill, no, it wasn’t me.
    joe

  15. August 20, 2008 at 4:02 pm

    Joe;
    I think you should definitely name your new car Claire when it arrives.

    I’ve given several of your books to people, but how do you get people to start helping themselves?

    Kind of like “You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink”… you’re saying maybe some other drinking horses would do the trick!

    I’d like to add that to the list of items I’d like to ask you about sometime, you know, in that interview I want to do with you!

    Fred

  16. Miguel-Reply
    August 20, 2008 at 4:19 pm

    Interesting issue Dr. Vitale. I have found about a technique named Cybernetic Transposition you endorsed along with Stuart Lichman and also reading the Pelmanism books after The Secret, Zero Limits and Think and Grow Rich. My best consideration is “if someone likes to be stuck like others will not make anything to change his/her past and would like to remain as others do”. I will aprecciate a comment from you about CT, please.

  17. August 20, 2008 at 4:47 pm

    People around us are very important unfortunately 🙁 … People are always telling me “you cannot”… I hate to hear what I can or cannot. I’ve read 8 books about The Law and Quantum Thinking including Attractor Factor & The Key. I have Zero Limits also.

    So my books, your blog dear Joe and free stuff you put on the internet with your colleagues (such as the free teleseminar about miracles weekend) are my sources to turn my face on.

    So thank you… really. please keep’em coming.

  18. August 21, 2008 at 11:48 am

    Joe,

    Thanks for your simple explanations. I love how you can remind me of what I could possibly look at in my life to make it more effective.

    Barry

  19. August 21, 2008 at 5:05 pm

    Just a note: Oprah had a special on poverty recently, and pointed out that the majority of homeless people are single mothers. I noticed, when I checked out the “End Homelessness” website that the picture at the top was an old man with a beard. Just wanted to mention that this is actually a stereotype image, and does not reflect the true nature of homelessness in America.

    Love&Gratitude,
    Ilana

  20. August 21, 2008 at 5:43 pm

    Joe, I’m after that new Attractor Factor book you’ve just wrote. How can I get a copy of it? I’ve looked on Amazon and I’ve seen that you can pre-order Expect Miracles.

    Support is an issue for those pursuing success. The message seems like who you spend your time with is your future.

  21. August 22, 2008 at 11:22 am

    thank you for everything,,,peace

  22. August 23, 2008 at 2:33 am

    Hi Joe,

    This is the first time (I think) that I’ve commented here though I’ve been a fan of yours for a long time.

    I regret that I haven’t (at least yet) been able to manifest a way to get to your “Miracles Weekend.” I’m looking forward to meeting you sometime in the near future.

    I too share your concern with homelessness in this country, or in the world for that matter. Having been homeless in the past, as you have, I understand too well the feeling of hopelessness that usually accompanies it.

    I do know though, that some people don’t really want to live otherwise. Without going on to article length here, I’ve known a couple of people who had considerable money in the bank but still lived the homeless life. Still others just become complacent and are unwilling to do anything to help themselves. I don’t believe that they are in the majority but, as long as they have no desire to change there’s nothing that can be done long term to help them. Therefore, homelessness can never be completely eradicated.

    I’m no preacher by a long shot but I remember something in the Bible about “the poor will always be with us.” In order to give assistance to a person, the person must want the help!

    For a long time, I didn’t really want to improve myself bad enough to do anything about it. Thank God those days are over. I had to reach “rock bottom” and be thoroughly disgusted with my life the way it had been before any change was possible. Some people, unfortunately, never get there.

    The best we can do is provide as much help as we can to those who want it and set an example for those who, as of yet, don’t. You are a shining example of one who has taken the steps and, when necessary, accepted the help to become a role model for the “down and outers.”

    Duane

  23. August 25, 2008 at 5:13 pm

    Awesome post, Dr. Vitale. As harsh as it may sound, sometimes you really do have to “fire” your friends and even some family members. (Maybe even your kids, if they’re truly keeping you back and preventing you from realizing your dreams.)

    It’s too bad your old friend in Ohio doesn’t “get it.” Have you tried giving him some of your books and DVDs?

    Anyway, I think that Operation YES is an awesome idea and I just signed up.

    Thank you for all you do!

    Yours in Absolute Abundance, utter gratitude and boundless joy,
    Kalea Makana
    “The Abundance Chick”

  24. October 11, 2008 at 6:58 pm

    Joe

    Thanks for being in my movie http://www.thecompass.tv

    It is going to be huge for all of us!!!

  25. Raju-Reply
    October 21, 2008 at 10:47 am

    Joe, I have known it for long but i kept ignoring the issue. Even though I know that my circle is responsible for keeping me where I am, I never had the nerve to call it quits. I do have very positive association, but the power of the negative association is too strong to brush aside. I haven’t made up my mind yet. But I think I should, pretty soon. Or else, well let me not say it. Thanks for the wonderful post

    Your secret fan:wink:
    Raju

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