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What I Learned from a Stripper

Decades ago a stripper hired me. Yes, a stripper. She wanted to write a book about her years as a topless dancer, and her transformation to being a military officer. I agreed to see her. Of course.

I enjoyed our meetings. She was attractive, upbeat and positive. She had a fascinating life (boy, could I tell you some stories) and she was on a new path in the military. I thought her story was fascinating and inspiring. Stimulating, too.

We met several times. We both knew her book had the potential for greatness. It could entertain and educate people. And I predicted it could be a bestseller. With the help of the Internet, which was new then but still a viable promotional vehicle, she could get the word out to thousands of potential readers. This would be a hit. I knew it.

But then she disappeared.

She didn’t answer her phone or email. I had an address for her, so I wrote her the old fashioned way, by snail mail. But the letter came back as undeliverable.

What happened?

One day I ran into her at a restaurant. She was friendly to me but aloof. She didn’t explain her disappearance or avoidance. I scratched my head for a while until I realized she had everything lined up for success except the most important ingredient of all: the inner.

I’ve seen this happen countless times with various people I’ve helped (or tried to help) over the years. They get really close to success and then back away. I remember one time having a check in hand for a singer, waiting to meet him to give him a tithe or love offering for inspiring me with his music.  He had promised to meet. But at the last minute, he didn’t show. We rescheduled. He didn’t show the next time, either. Of course, he never got the check. And that’s the point.

What I’m demonstrating to you is this: There is a very real “inner game” to success. It means if you don’t get in alignment with success inside yourself – with your beliefs and self worth and sense of deservingness – then you may very well sabotage your own potential. And you may not even know it. You’ll just blame someone (anyone) else on things not working out.

This is HUGE.

Part of my writings these days is about helping you get the inner game set up right. That means knowing success is good, money is good, you are good, the Internet is good, marketing is good, and winning is good. Until you feel that way inside yourself, on a deep level in your unconscious mind, your inner game will be off. And when the inner is not in alignment for success, virtually nothing you do will work.

Inner Critic vs Inner Master

Inner Critic vs Inner Master

None of this is new. I first wrote and spoke about “inner game” awareness back the 1980’s, and you’ll find it in my book, Hypnotic Writing. Back then I talked about there being a “critic” and a “master” within you. The critic stops you from completing anything because it turns your passion into mush. The master is the part of you that can do things successfully.

Too often, we listen to the inner critic. As a result, we end up sabotaging ourselves. What gets even more curious is the fact we seem to prefer it that way. We actually seem to like failing rather than succeeding.

I know this first hand. I struggled for decades. I was homeless. I was in poverty. I was miserable. I was doing everything right, yet I couldn’t seem to succeed. It wasn’t until I started turning within and working on my inner game that things began to shift. As I got clear within myself of all the negative and limiting beliefs, I was able to free myself to allow what I was doing to finally succeed.

What was the big secret?

I had to change the inner game within me from one of expecting failure to one of expecting success. Today I live a lifestyle of the rich and famous. Yet I’m the same guy who struggled decades ago, though. The only change is within me.

Let’s look at this a little more closely.

Why would you not be in alignment for success?

First, unconscious beliefs are running your life.

For example, most of us have been brought up to think “money is the root of all evil.” If you think money is evil, would you want to have any? Hardly. As I wrote in my book, Attract Money Now, money is neutral. The biblical quote everyone remembers is inaccurate. The longer quote says it’s the love of money that is the problem. Well, guess what, all the wealthy people I know don’t love money, they simply appreciate it. Big difference.

But the inner game goes deeper than that.

Most of us have been taught that we aren’t worthy of success. We received subtle messages from family, friends, culture, religion, government, and the school system and more that we are victims and that struggling is the way of life. I had to go through poverty and homelessness before I found that not to be true. You can make it true, of course. But it doesn’t have to be true.

Second, your self-talk is controlling you.

Most people don’t take any notice of what they are doing inside. The inner game is all about how you talk to yourself as well as what you unconsciously believe about yourself. I encouraged a former cheerleader to write a book on how all of us can create an inner cheerleader inside ourselves. Because she was in alignment for success and her inner game was set for success, she did in fact write and publish her book.

Develop Your Inner Cheerleader

Develop Your Inner Cheerleader

I’ve often said that I can teach you about Internet marketing, copywriting, publicity and more. After all, I’ve written Buying Trances, There’s a Customer Born Every Minute, and so on. I’ve been marketing online for decades. I created marketing formulas that get results. I can teach you what works. But if your inner game isn’t ready for success, you’ll either not listen to me, misinterpret what I tell you, or simply not do anything at all.

Why? Because your inner voices are talking you out of your own good.

Listen to me. Even right now, as you read these words, there’s a voice in your head talking. It might be telling you to take notes and get ready to take action. Or it might be whispering that you need to stop reading this nonsense and go do the laundry.

What can you do about this?

1. Be aware. Listen to the voices in your head. The naysayers are the team on the inner game of failure side. The cheerleaders are the team on the inner game of success side. You can learn to tell the difference. You can learn to choose who to listen to. After all, you are in charge, not the voices. I’ve written a song for Strut!, my recent music CD, called “The Choice.” It’s to help remind us that we can choose who to listen to. You have choice.

2. Get support. I find results happen faster when you surround yourself with people who truly want your success. I created Miracles Coaching for that reason. That program has been helping people over five years now. But you can also create or join a mastermind group. The idea is to plant yourself where success will grow, by getting sunshine from other people. (And giving it to them, too, or course.)

3. Take action. The more you take action, the more you will get feedback about what you truly believe in your inner world. You don’t need to beat yourself up if things don’t always work. It’s all data. Just learn, adjust, and move forward. Not everything I tried worked out, but instead of giving up, I learned and moved on to create another project that did achieve success.

This is how the inner game of success actually works. It’s what happens on the inside of you that creates or attracts the outer results you get. If you want to change the outer, change your inner.

In a way, you have to became a stripper of beliefs (as opposed to becoming a stripper on stage).

May you strip away limitations and strut to success.

After all, you deserve it.

Right?

Ao Akua,

joe

PS – Last year I gave a presentation at the offices of my Miracles Coaching team where I explained seven ways to get clear. The group loved the steps. The event was filmed and later turned into a free course you can watch online. Go here to see it right now: http://www.joevitalecoach.com/campaigns/sevensteps/

PPS — You can hear excerpts from my healing music albums at  Strut! and Blue Healer. The direct links are:  http://www.HealingMojoMusic.com and http://www.GetUpandStrut.com Enjoy.

Member BBB 2003- 2012

Member BBB 2003- 2012

20 Comments

  1. February 1, 2012 at 8:18 am

    Joe,i’ve been your fan since last year watch the movie Secret.your philosophy and intelligency had made me to have a rethink about the kind of person i wish to be,and set goals to that would lead me to that person.I love what you do here.thanks for sharing your ideas.Uche.Nigeria.

  2. Dear Joe, from the bottom of my heart: Thank you! This blog post is very inspirational, and everybody should read it!

    I love the ‘picture’ of having an inner cheerleader!

    Tons of hugs and love,
    Claus 😀

    PS: I’m ready to strip away limitations and strut to success!! ;-D

  3. Dear Joe, from the bottom of my heart: Thank you! This blog post is very inspirational, and everybody should read it!

    I love the ‘picture’ of having an inner cheerleader!

    Tons of hugs and love,
    Claus 😀

    PS: I’m ready to strip away limitations and strut to success!! ;-D

  4. February 1, 2012 at 1:43 pm

    Awesome stuff Dr Joe. One of the benefits if becoming consciously aware of ourselves is that we can see when we are operating from either either the master role or the critic role.

    The critic needs everything to be perfect as the master knows that everything perfectly imperfect and can still be of benefit.

  5. February 1, 2012 at 3:28 pm

    Hi Joe ! 🙂

    A really great story & post! Very inspiring, thanks a lot!

    Btw. thanks for your free book “Attract Money Now”, great read!

  6. February 1, 2012 at 3:43 pm

    As always I loved reading your Blog, thank you for taking the time to share your wisdom and thoughts 😉

    Peace, love, and music,
    Mathew

  7. Maurice-Reply
    February 2, 2012 at 5:11 pm

    Joe:

    Yesterday (same date as this post), you sent me an email (see below) that disturbed me, to which I responded (see below). Coincidentally (or maybe not), yesterday one of your Miracles Coaches also called me. I sent him the emails (below), and today, he said you probably actually wrote the email that disturbed me, which disturbed me even further. I hope you can straighen out the misleading information in the email.

    Having said that, I am using Ho’oponopono to “clean” on my reaction to your email, recognizing that I have also been misleading (and judgemental) towards others at times in my life. I take 100% responsibility for the bad data/information in your email to me, and for my reaction to it.

    I love you, I am sorry, please forgive me, and thank you (for this opportunity to clean).

    Maurice

    ___

    Joe:

    I love your work with Hooponopono/zero limits.

    This email (below), however, is misleading (I am being kind), so I wanted to bring that to your attention, because you do not seem to be a guy who wants that result. You indicate in the email (see highlights below) that “THIS site reveals what” … “the two most IMPORTANT steps for getting what you want from life using the power of your mind + the universe.”

    That statement (presented in two sentences below) is not true. The only thing the website tells us is how to buy that information somewhere else. That is very different than your claim. So, I just wasted 20 minutes reading a website that told me nothing, when I could have been “cleaning” using Hooponopono. And I don’t have $147 to discover the “two most IMPORTANT steps for getting what you want from life using the power of your mind + the universe”, but would really like to know what they are. What are they?

    Please, to protect your valuable brand and personal reputation, I urge you to actually read the websites you recommend to see that they deliver what you claim (or I suspect some copywriter claimed).

    Regards!

    Maurice

    ___

    In a message dated 1/28/2012 11:18:42 A.M. Eastern Standard Time, [email protected] writes:

    The Law of Attraction as it is peddled by many books,
    movies and self-help gurus is a HOAX.

    If you’ve been suckered into believing you can just
    sit and ‘wish’ your way to a better life… there’s
    no nicer way to put it: You’ve probably been lied to.

    It may help to sell their books… but it won’t
    help you achieve whatever it is YOU want.

    The fact is, the Law of Attraction will only work
    if you’re doing it the *right* way — and almost
    every book, course or DVD conveniently misses out
    the two most IMPORTANT steps for getting what you want
    from life using the power of your mind + the universe.

    You’ve probably never heard them before… very
    few people even know they exist. Yet without
    them… you’re almost guaranteed to fail.

    Only THIS site reveals what they are…

    http://quantumcookbook.com/?afl=25972

    Go see.

    Love,

    joe

    Thank you.
    I love you.

    • February 3, 2012 at 9:55 am

      I’ll clean on it…

      • February 6, 2012 at 2:30 am

        Very interesting to see you let this message published despite of his bad critic on you. This means for me you are a gentleman.

        For sure your “allways for all” marketing attitude can be a real astonishment for European people and so on, but your sincerity is real also, and that is an other real fact.

        I have 2 questions and one think, please read and answer as far as you can :

        1) did you envisage to publish some French tongue stuff (subtitled videos?)
        2) as a newcomer and recent reader of your “Zero Limit” French translated book I wonder why the website http://www.hooponopono.org is not online anymore ? (there is a blank page since few days at least)

        The thinking : the French translation of Zero limit talk about this formula :
        I love you – I am sorry – Forgive me please – Thanks.
        (in French : Je t’aime – Je suis désolé – Pardonne-moi s’il te plaît – Merci.)

        But after some English researches, I found the more fluent ordered formula as :
        I’m sorry, please forgive me, I thank you and I love you.
        (Je suis désolé, s’il-te-plaît pardonne-moi, je te remercie et je t’aime.)

        These words sorted like that are so much more easy understood ! That is what I had to tell it to you.

        A lot of thanks for your attention, and maybe in advance for your answers !

  8. KONSTANTINOS-Reply
    February 3, 2012 at 3:10 am

    Great post, Joe! Inspiring and thorough!

    I just wonder when the “naysayers” will start to appear , writting negative comments…. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1…..

  9. February 3, 2012 at 8:49 am

    Hello Joe. I love everything you write. I would like you to read my book “Chatting with the Universe”. I send it in PDF format, you can tell me an email to make the delivery. You can learn more about this book at AMAZON: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B006X389NS
    I await your response. A big hug

  10. Salvo-Reply
    February 3, 2012 at 10:10 am

    Hai perfettamente ragione Mr.Joe grazie al tuo libro “Corso di risveglio” ho scoperto di avere una credenza negativa sul denaro. Ecco cosa ho chiesto a me stesso (vendo fischietti in terracotta, ci provo 🙁 )
    Perchè non vendo abbastanza?vendere vuol dire chiedere soldi, se chiedo soldi vuol dire che non ne ho abbastanza, la pesona a cui li chiedo capisce che ho bisogno di soldi, di conseguenza mi può (come già accaduto): ricattare di abbassare il prezzo o non comprerà niente, a fine transazione può pagare ancora meno del prezzo pattuito, ad io dovrò accettare comunque, altrimenti rifiuterà di pagarmi, così perdo anche quel poco che potrebbe darmi, avrò perdite perchè ho investito dempo e denaro per produrre i miei fiscietti ed in fine perderò il cliente perchè non vorrà trattare più con me. Come posso eliminare questa credenza?

    translate whit software.
    You are absolutely right Mr.Joe thanks to your book “Awakening Course” I discovered a negative belief about money. Here’s what I asked myself (I sell ceramic whistles, I try 🙁 )
    Why not sell enough? selling means asking for money, ask for money if it means I do not have enough, ask the person they understand that I need money, so her can (as has already happened): blackmail to lower the price or not buy anything, at the end of the transaction may pay even less than the agreed price, and to accept it, otherwise it will refuse to pay me, I lose even what little they could give me, I will have losses, because I have invested time and money to produce my ceramic whistles and finally lose the customer because they do not want to deal with me anymore.
    How can I delete this belief?
    Grazie.

  11. eli-Reply
    February 4, 2012 at 2:36 am

    dear joe,thank you very much for this post.it`s great! i read all your books but every time i come here, i learn new things. you are amazing. thanks for all the information.

  12. February 4, 2012 at 4:31 am

    Respected Sir
    Dr Joe Vitale

    SUB:- “Unique Blogg”

    I read your story in The Secret Book. Great. Really you are a Great Author. Presently I have designed a website which does not exist in the whole world. I make any thing in I.T. field whenever it does not exist in the whole world. It’s my passion to invent something new in the I.T. field every year, till i live. I am also writing a book as a Co-author. My stories are selected in some books as a co-editor. I am Co-author of 10 books. As Possible Read My Blog About …..

    1) Things that happen every 60 seconds on the Internet

    2) Peek into Apple secrets, courtesy Stanford archives

    3) iPad 3 launch rumored for Steve Jobs’ Feb 24 birthday By Adam Rosenberg | Digital
    Trends

    4) Top 10 Most Significant Search & Social Marketing Stories of 2011 by Guillaume
    Bouchard

    5) The five-year race to save India’s vanishing tigers

    6) America’s 10 Richest Zip Codes, 2011

    7) Top 10 Indian Writers in English Today.

    And Much More http://bittugandhi.blogspot.com/?spref=gb

    Have a great day;

    Yours Faithfully
    Bittu Gandhi
    (Researcher, Author, International Record Holder)

  13. February 4, 2012 at 11:20 am

    Inspiring story. I never thought you experienced that before.
    I still wonder though what really happened to that woman. She must have missed something big there.

  14. jane-Reply
    February 6, 2012 at 1:16 am

    HI, Dr Vitale,
    I have listened to your awakening course many, many times for now few months. My question is, being always on the Now, you said that once you awaken, there is no need to use all the stuffs you told on how to attract what you want… how then can I get what I want in life? How does the Source know what I want to have?

    thank you?

    • February 6, 2012 at 7:28 am

      The “I” in you becomes Source, so it knows.

  15. Rozell-Reply
    February 23, 2012 at 11:33 pm

    The biggest battle in life is how to fight the war inside yourself and win. You are both the winner and loser in life on the battlefield called life. How to defeat yourself for the good of life is a tricky thing to each person. I know all to well of it and that’s why I only now focus all my energy of the good in life. I saw joe on the secret movie more than once and the magic about it. It’s all true that’s the part that shocks people.

  16. Exetta Windfield-Reply
    July 27, 2014 at 3:05 pm

    Hi I am really interested in how to write a book about my life that I know will help so many. As someone who has survived numerous molestations, spousal abuse, neglect from parents,even attacks from men I do get the concept of how that inner demon can get the best of you. It was so hard for me to complete things and the goals i did complete was to prove a point.

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